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In this groundbreaking book, a social psychologist who’s been chronicling the lives of American families for over two decades confronts our deepest concerns, including our silence and self-imposed sense of isolation, when our grown kids have failed to thrive. She listens to a generation that “did everything right” and expected its children to grow into happy, healthy, successful adults. But they haven’t, at least, not yet—and meanwhile, we’re letting their problems threaten our health, marriages, security, freedom, careers or retirement, and other family relationships. With warmth, empathy, and perspective, Dr. Adams offers a positive, life-affirming message to parents who are still trying to “fix” their adult children—Stop! She shows us how to separate from their problems without separating from them, and how to be a positive force in their lives while getting on with our own. As we navigate this critical passage in our second adulthood and their first, the bestselling author of I’m Still Your Mother reminds us that the pleasures and possibilities of postparenthood should not depend on how our kids turn out, but on how we do!","forthcoming":false,"isbn13":"9780743232814","publication_date":"20040603","publisher":"Free Press","slug":"when-our-grown-kids-disappoint-us","subtitle":"Letting Go of Their Problems, Loving Them Anyway, and Getting on With Our Lives","title":"When Our Grown Kids Disappoint US"},"discovery":{"categories":{"all":[{"bisac_code":"FAM034020","confidence_band":"medium","label":"Co-Parenting","score":0.7988,"source":"bisac_hint_model"},{"bisac_code":"FAM034010","confidence_band":"medium","label":"Single Parenting","score":0.7792,"source":"bisac_hint_model"},{"bisac_code":"REL012030","confidence_band":"medium","label":"Christian Family & Relationships","score":0.7764,"source":"bisac_hint_model"}],"hint":[{"bisac_code":"FAM034020","confidence_band":"medium","label":"Co-Parenting","score":0.7988,"source":"bisac_hint_model"},{"bisac_code":"FAM034010","confidence_band":"medium","label":"Single Parenting","score":0.7792,"source":"bisac_hint_model"},{"bisac_code":"REL012030","confidence_band":"medium","label":"Christian Family & Relationships","score":0.7764,"source":"bisac_hint_model"}],"publisher":[{"bisac_code":"FAM033000","confidence_band":"high","label":"Parenting Grown Kids","score":1,"source":"onix_publisher_code"},{"bisac_code":"FAM054000","confidence_band":"high","label":"Midlife & Beyond","score":1,"source":"onix_publisher_code"},{"bisac_code":"SEL042000","confidence_band":"high","label":"Managing Emotions","score":1,"source":"onix_publisher_code"}]},"genres":[{"label":"Co-Parenting","score":0.7988,"slug":"co-parenting"},{"label":"Single Parenting","score":0.7792,"slug":"single-parenting"},{"label":"Christian Family & Relationships","score":0.7764,"slug":"christian-family-relationships"}],"reader_fit":["Parents of adult children facing challenges","Good for readers interested in family dynamics and personal growth"],"related_lists":[],"series":null,"similar_books":[{"authors":["Jim Burns Ph.D","Jim Burns"],"book_id":"9780310353775","cover_image_url":"https://img.bookfrontier.com/9780310353775.jpg?v=20260414T102527Z%3A2026-04-14T10%3A25%3A27Z","score":17.3851,"title":"Doing Life With Your Adult Children","url":"https://bookfrontier.com/books/9780310353775"},{"authors":["Armin A. 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